Health Grieving Process – Coming to Terms With Death


In 2002 my father requires triple bypass surgery. My father had severe heart disease and heart muscle was extremely weak. My father is a surgeon, was exceptional! In fact, my father and President Clinton the same surgeon had. My father, the operation was successful. All of his doctors, my father called it a miracle man. My father, the doctors said if his life expectancy by five years. My dad-the team doctors were so wrong. The doctor had no idea, will, fight and determination my father had to fight for his life.

In 2011 my father was diagnosed with metastases prostate cancer metastases in his bones. My father told his family, the doctor said his life expectancy was two years. Again, my father beat the odds. For many years I have been in denial of my father’s health decline. Actually, I just remember it now how ill my father was all these years. He seemed to beat all the odds and I also like his doctors believed that he was a miracle man.

In early September of 2016, I went to Florida to mom and dad. I was so excited to spend a week in your house like our time. My parents and I had the pleasure to try new restaurants, enjoyed going to the movies, play cards, and especially we enjoyed each other to talk for hours about anything and everything.

This time when I arrived, my father was not so good. In General, my dad was a lack of energy, it was difficult for him to freely move his body in addition, he suffered from severe back pain. I think my father might be suspected cancer backwards through the crowd to the pain he had before My father did not want to take any additional tests for his prostate because he said that it Zytigra drugs were his last hope.

I asked my father several times, let me take him to the hospital, but he refused. I didn’t want to stop, I begged and begged my father let me take him to the hospital. As usual, my father refused and said, “Let me see if I felt better within a few days.” My father was a hard, stubborn and strong man. I think the reason why he beat the odds and became known as the miracle man.

I asked my father to accompany me, find the calculator that I bought him for his 81st birthday. When my father said he didn’t want to go, I knew something was wrong. He loved computers. He was one of the first people I knew bought me a computer for surfing the Internet. My father was always ahead of time, he was a true visionary. When the Internet first started, my father predicted that the Internet is huge and technological developments will change how to lead the world of business.

I went to Best buy to Purchase only the father is the all-in-one computer for his birthday. The experience was not the same without my father. We would be fun to learn about new technologies and choosing your birthday gift.

I brought the computer back to my parents home and put it in my father’s hobby cellar, his lair. He was so happy and grateful new computer with all the bells and whistles. Still, my father was he that he hardly surfing the Internet, or play Internet games. I was sick from anxiety.

The next day I finally convinced my father to spend some time with each other, we went to his favorite Jewish grocery store in the city of Delray beach, Florida. On a trip to Delhi, my father barely spoke. It was very unusual. My father never was. We always had interesting conversations and could talk about anything. How to say my father finally did, he said, “I wrote my own Eulogy, and I want, I want to be sure that one of my children or all my children to read it when it’s time.” My father told me that he wanted to talk to the Rabbi, who was a stranger, about him and his life. My father tried to comfort me and said, “Now I expect me for quite a long time.”

I showed no emotion, while my father talked about his Eulogy, I didn’t want to show that my father, at least with a broken heart, I was at the thought of his death. It was something that I thought too often and was beaten with anti zipatorischen mourning for many years.

My father and I were very close, I really looked up to him. He never made me charges. I thought it was amazing, especially because I’m gay (I don’t like the word lesbian). I’m a 15 year relationship with a woman. My father loved my partner and treated them like a daughter. However, I am very happy, my parents to accept my relationship and my partner how to treat the third daughter. My partners have treated my parents very well and I had a great relationship with my mom and dad.

In mid-September my father returned, and finally went to the hospital. I asked him why he let me take him to the hospital when I was there in early September. My father replied, “I don’t want to spoil your vacation.” I told him that I was worried and I wish he let me take him to the hospital.

My father said from the hospital-a doctor he is super weak heart and there was nothing she could do for him. My father was a cardiologist does not agree with the hospital doctor prognosis. My father was a cardiologist prescribe drugs to improve your heart’s pumping function and to maintain your blood pressure. My father was in the hospital for weeks and then in rehab. He was good at a rehabilitation center, his family said he felt better and stronger than he had in a long time. My father was in a rehabilitation center within one month. He came home stronger and maintained his condition for several months.

To decline his health began in January 2016. In February, he lost interest in his daily activities, food, as well as in conversation with his family. It was clear that something was wrong. I decided to deny it, but I thought that my father might be the flu.

In February, my father took a Delray hospital, where she told him his vital organs and blood were fine, but his potassium level was low. The doctor gave him some potassium pills and sent him home. I felt relief, my father had no symptoms of progressive prostate cancer or CHF. He was only a low potassium level.

However, a few weeks after the visit to the hospital, my father was not only himself. I called my father every morning, my father always told me how much he loved them tomorrow our calls. However, when I called my dad, he wanted to say that I have no strength to talk, I give mom the phone. Now, if I knew something was just not right. My mother told me not to feel bad, “your father never says who’s calling.” I didn’t know this time, but now I know that my father is slowly diverge from the world of the living and preparation for transition.

In March, my father complained that after to get up in the morning, brush your teeth, and during Breakfast he didn’t have energy for the rest of the day. He complained for weeks. He returned to the hospital in March. Again, the hospital, the doctor said that for my father there is nothing that you can do for him. Again, my father’s cardiologist did not agree and gave my father intervenes to help the drugs to improve heart pumping function. This time the product didn’t work.

At this point, my father asked my brother to come and visit him in the hospital.

My brother lives in California, I can’t remember my father was always surprised my brother to visit him in the hospital. At this point, the family there was something seriously wrong. It turned out that my father had unfinished business with my brother and wanted to talk to him, if he’s not home from the hospital.

My father was in the hospital for weeks, when it was time for my father to dismiss, the hospice staff welcomed my family and explained my father was a candidate for hospice. Hospice explained my father was in his own home with hospice. We all stand negotiable! We didn’t want to believe my father was at the end of his life, and there is no medical treatment that could help him.

When the hospice told my father that he had to sign DNT order, he flipped out! After much deliberation, my father reluctantly signed. The hospice staff explained that my father was the hospice to finish, when his health improved, his diagnoses changed, or for any other reason. I was still in denial, think about it, would my father back on his feet, as he had always done it.

My father returned home in mid-March under hospice care. The first week my dad came back home, my sister flew from new Jersey to Florida to help mom care for my dad. I my parents have been calling several times a day to see how my father was going. My sister said that it would be better, “dad bedridden, just eat and sleep most of the time.


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